The Wine: 2015 Nero d’Avola, Tracy Hills
The Winery: Domenico Winery, San Carlos, CA
The W(H)ine: Mindset Matters
Last week I wondered if I would make it to this week. Not because an earthquake hit southern California rendering me injured or homeless; not because a cancer wracked my body to the problematic point; and not because my mental health had me lose desire to wake up again. Rather, because I spent too much time ruminating and decided since my life had clearly been fully lived without accomplishing hopes, dreams and even societal norms, it may make more sense to manage my existence more wisely. Tap out. End on a note, maybe high even, but at least it would be one determined by me.
Since the Universe appears so slow on the Uptake.
Did I want to die? No. But thank you for asking. I just was no longer sure what Living offered. Some days strike sadder than others. Holy Week came, went, and waxed anti-climatic, as all previous traditions proved Undone.
Family lives far away. My choice, not theirs.
Community cancels church services. Covid’s choice, not mine or theirs.
Love lives within, singly right now. His choice, definitely not mine.
So, other than re-relocating to the Midwest to fix my presenting ailment, and though Good Friday AND Easter worship availed online, and beside the fact I am wholly and completely in Love with Me, I lacked luster to linger around any longer.
I suffered from my own mind-f*&%.
Two juxtaposed types of mindset are oft discussed: open versus closed; positive versus negative; or perhaps, growth versus fixed.
In a 2016 edition of Psychology Today, Gary Klein Ph.D. offers the following definition, “A mindset is a belief that orients the way we handle situations—the way we sort out what is going on and what we should do.” Mindsets, apparently, can be our best friends, or our own self-defeating demise-inducing demons.
In the course of the seven-day-week following my Easter, where more than Jesus’ tomb found itself empty and looking for occupation, I encountered the following reframes restoring some hope for recovery, if not absolute Resurrection. Apparently, mindset of any type is my choice, entirely.
Writing ‘Coach’ Stephen Pressfield, Turning Pro, “…just change your mind.”
Personal Training Coach Martha Madrigal, “Mind over matter.”
Creativity Coach Rose Corrick, “You ‘get’ to, not you ‘have’ to, it’s all a mindset shift.”
Universe ‘Coach,’ aka Scripture, “As you think, so are ye.”
Commercial ‘Coach’ via Nike, “Just do it!”
Let me elaborate.
My current writing mentor, author Pressfield says there is no magic bullet, “Going pro is simply Changing Your Mind. Glue your ass to the writing chair and write.” Okay, then. That is what I will do.
Martha (did you see Whine On The Vine show today on LA Talk Radio?) asks when I offer her excuses, “Do you really want this?” Duh, who pays a gym training coach if not for physical transformation.
Rose, while “holding space” with me to accomplish whatever it is that I want, mindfully reminds my wandering Mind, “You either Empower or disEmpower yourself. All Wisdom lies within. Just shift your Mindset.” Oh, is that all????? It really is.
Then there is God… or Whomever He/She choose to put canonical word choices on canvas (or was it parchment or oral tradition in Scriptures Book of Proverbs). One English translation of ancient texts of chapter four, verse twenty-three, “Be very careful about what you think. Your thoughts run your life.” Even the Universe supports this shit.
Somehow I still suppose my magical thinking can outmaneuver all above Advices. So I settle in for nightly Netflix or other MindLess entertainment. Then, as commercials interrupt, even the sponsors of such silliness say the same damn thing, “Just Do It!”
Just. Make. Up. Your. Mind.
That. Is. All. It. Takes.
“Cognitive therapists have long understood that we don’t simply respond to events in life, but to our interpretations of those events. Mindsets are an important means through which we process and reprocess the events of our lives. That matters, because our processing ultimately shapes our emotional experience. Limits become challenges, and challenges become sources of opportunity and growth.” -Brett Steenbarger (accessed article “Why Mindset Matters online at https://www.forbes.com/sites/brettsteenbarger/2020/06/28/why-mindset-matters/?sh=402452da7d2b April 12, 2021).
What is on your Mind at this moment? You hold all the power, my friends.
*One major caveat: if/when/as mental health issues stand in the way of mindset matters, there is help. So much help. Don’t you dare hesitate to ask….
National Suicide Prevention Line: 800-273-8255
Never Hesitate to Phone a Friend: 877-968-8491
Remember, “Wellness is spelled with ‘we’” - Rev Doctor Cornelius May